13/365: birthday post =)

I turn 22 today. =) But there is so much more than that.

The shot:

Me and my brother during the 2010 fluvial parade.

The story:

Today started out to be a bittersweet day for me. Sweet because I have been blessed with another year added to my life and bitter because my brother is not graduating this year. Something like that is a big thing for me. My brother's success in anything that he gives his effort in means a lot to me.

For the rest of the day, I kept on praying that the Lord walk with me through the day and celebrate it with me. I prayed that He grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change. I spent the first few minutes of my day in prayer and in thanking those who took the time to greet me. At 9:30 AM, I was in school for the dissemination of my students' grades. After lunch, I went to hear mass. Amazingly, the celebrant is also celebrating his birthday and as the mass ended, everyone in the assembly sang 'happy birthday' which I felt was God's way of singing for me. Sweeeet! <3

My brother texted me that he is attending his classmates' graduation and so I decided to spend the rest of my time reading Leo Buscaglia's book, Loving Each Other. I was in the chapter about forgiveness when my brother joined me for the rest of the afternoon. My conversation with him was no less than inspiring. It wasn't because of his choice of words and nor was it because of his manner of speaking. What made it inspiring is the man that he has chosen to become as reflected in his thoughts. There was no tinge of bitterness or sarcasm in his voice when he spoke about the graduation. There was pride and great love for friends who stood by him and who he stood for for the past four years. He was happy for his friends and in many ways, I felt he has grown a lot wiser.

It has been said many times before and I think it holds true today. There is a purpose for everything. In the remaining hours of my 'birthday', I choose to write about my brother. He is more than the man other people think he is. He is more than what others give him credit for. I am truly proud of him. Thank you for your example, dong.

The 'ate' turns 22 today and has learned that in a heart of love, no room should be rented out to bitterness. That would be such a waste of space.

A happy day indeed. =)

12/365: RAISE hangover

I just got home from the YFC Raise (Praise and Worship) Concert and I spent a few minutes trying to fit what I want to say in 420 words (allowable number of words for an FB status ) but to no avail. I guess this is what they call inspiration. Haha!

The shot:
Of course, the event promotional picture which is actually the gold ticket that I got from the event! :) Got this photo from a tumbler account. I could upload the picture of my ticket but my head is spinning and I need to get to bed ASAP. Haha (excuses, excuses). I just want to get these words out before they escape me. :)

The story:
I was thinking of not going to the event since the person that I was planning to go with was not allowed to leave their house. My reason? I had to check tons of papers. I know. The reason sounds lame but for people who know me, the reason is well, so.. er.. soooo me. Haha. I want to get my work done but I felt the urge to just go. It's been so long since I worshiped with my YFC community so I went. I was late but was still on time for the start of the program. =p

I enter and was shocked to know that I barely know most of the members of the service team (was I away THAT long?). Haha! Then, the first song comes in and I start thinking "uh-oh. I don't know this one.." and the second one begins and still the same, I am not familiar with any of them. (am I THAT old??)

Mishy: Lord, kanta tag song na kamao ko...
Lord: you know all these songs by heart... you just stopped singing.
Mishy: (laughs to self) (pauses) (smiles to self) (continues singing)

True enough, I know one or two of the entire two-hour song list but I managed to sing together with the others because the lyrics were in display and because the tune was not very complicated. But I think, this is because in a worship, it's never just about the music or the songs but it's about the Lord of the music and the songs... and when you sing to a person who just loves you unconditionally, you can never go wrong. =)

Later on, sharings started coming in and it felt like I never left. This was so YFC. I knew I made the right choice of coming because I needed a reminder... for many things but mostly for the fact that what I do is for the Lord and regardless if I am tired, weary, sick or happy, I just lift it up to Him because all of it is HIS. Have Your Way and All for You are my major, major songs for the night.

I am terribly stressed thinking of the papers to be checked, grades to be computed and many other tasks that had deadlines painted all over them. However, in reflection, I am stressed not because of what I have to do but because I have forgotten that I am not about what I do but what I am becoming because of what I do. I am, after all, not a human doing but a human being. Tonight reminded me that what I do does not define me. I do what I do because of who I am and I am God's servant, called by name and anointed. If the all-powerful God believes that I can do this, then who I am to let doubt and shame overcome my confidence that each step I take and each day I live is taking me closer to the woman that God dreams of me to become?

I looked around the venue and memories came rushing in. The concert was held in the same place where I realized that I had feelings for a friend. I laughed and told the Lord that He was teasing me again. I felt Him smile at me and at that same moment, we were singing the line, "my hear belongs to you...Jesus". And at that, He asked me: "Can I have it back, anak?" I couldn't fight back the tears. How could I have placed him before Him? I'm glad that God is a jealous God (because He wants me back. yey!!!) but that He is not an envy God for He waited for me to come back. God waits... for me. I complain that I have been waiting and waiting and waiting. But I have never heard God complain about how I keep Him waiting because of the most trivial things.

God waits. God is true love. True love waits.

Moreover, I want to learn how to love like God. As Kuya Sharry would put it, nothing less than God is love because God IS love. So with that, I handed it back to HIM. I can wait. Really, I can. :)

Needless to say, I brought home more than a 'golden ticket' and a stamped arm. I am tired but I feel like I am ready for anything this week is going to throw at me. Haha, what a night! Wohoo! See what I mean? How do you put all of these in 420 words? Oh com'on!

I have to sleep already. But before that, I want to say I LOVE JESUS and May GOD be praised forever! =)