The shot: This one is something I took from a tumbler page. Credit goes to this person.The story: I watched Something Borrowed yesterday and until now, I can't seem to get over it. This happens to me all the time. Movies, koreanovelas, books, a good story.. I get hooked to these things when they trigger a strong emotion in me. For the last three days, I have been stuck at home because I got my wisdom tooth extracted and there's a mandatory (according to my mom) resting period for me. I know that there are a lot of things that I can do and busy myself with like reviewing for the comprehensive exams, thinking of a topic for thesis, preparing for CYLS or for the incoming school year, etc. but there is just something about silence that makes you think. It makes you reflect. And aside from playing Tetris Battle in Facebook (Rank 14, BTW), my days are filled with reflection and movies, movies, movies! (This might be as good as my summer vacation gets so why not treat myself, right? HAHA!)
The other movies just passed me by but something about the last one I saw just kept haunting me today. The story revolves around this girl who never told a guy she liked him and then in the end, she finds out that he's liked her since forever but he just thought she didn't feel that way. The plot is very familiar but I think this crew's got a very good scriptwriter. I take note of lines and many of the lines here are quiet thought-provoking that I end up pausing the streamed (oops) video many times because I felt the need to digest what was just said.
I guess the lesson that I really got out from this movie was not so much as love lost but more of a life left un-lived. Un-lived in the sense that what we have always prayed for stares us right in the face, presents itself to us and then we turn around and walk away because we are haunted by the feeling of being inadequate and a sense of unworthiness. This is the part that haunts me. I look back at the times when I felt that what I have prayed for has finally come but I let it pass me by. Maybe I'm not good enough. Not this time. This can't be for me. Too good to be true. He deserves someone better. --- I never ran out of excuses. And I am haunted by all those times that I felt I have not truly lived. Sure, I might have ended up hurt and disappointed but I am, right now, hurt and disappointed anyway. The irony of life. I can't help but laugh it off at times but this one is a good hit on the head for me.
I have promised to choose to never regret the choices that I make and so with this realization, I decided to resolve that from this day forward, I will exert more effort into living my life. Hey, He died so I can live it. I'm crossing my fingers and I'm hoping that there will be lesser what ifs this time around. <3
