I have been on a facebook and hiatus lately to prepare for my comprehensive exams. The hiatus was a success but the 'preparing for the compre exams' part is an epic fail so far. I don't know why but preparing for exams just is not my thing. Contrary to popular belief, I do not enjoy studying. Really. When I say studying, I mean it as opening your books/notes and reading them as you prepare for an exam. I loooovveee school and I love learning new things and applying them/teaching them to others but I can't get myself to enjoy studying. In reflection though, this would backfire to me in the sense that I always hope that my students study for the exams I give them. Haha, the life of a teacher.
But, something interesting happened last week. I was preparing for a lesson on stress and time management and in one of my sources, it was shared that many people 'procrastinate' because they fear failure. It is easier to admit failure because you haven't tried than to admit failure in the midst of trying. PAK. That rock hit me on the head hard.
I have been telling people that I am not ready for the exams (refer to the first part of this entry. hehe) because of work and other work-related stuff but really, I think I am just hiding behind this excuse so that if I fail, I would not need to be so hard on myself since I tried but work is just getting on the way and all... BUT! I don't want to be this kind of Mishy anymore. If I fail, I want to go down knowing I've done nothing less than my absolute best. Sige na, help me pray for inspiration! I've got two weeks more to prepare! Waaahhhh.. desperation knocking on my door. So that's it. I'm writing this entry to encourage myself to do better. A month from now, I'll tell you if I passed/failed in my exams... and please know that whatever the outcome will be, I did give my best.
AMDG.
P.S. God bless those who are taking the LET today!
